The Other Bennet Sister, Episode 7 — Recap: Together, But Free

Opens on: “Miss Bennet. You are quite unlike anyone I have ever met.”

What happened

The below summary might be viewed as spoilery

The episode opens exactly where the last one left us: Ryder and Mary alone, the family listening at the door, and Mrs Bennet full of expectation.

Ryder says Mary is unlike anyone he has ever met. He praises her directness, her refusal to conform, and then tells her he has developed the greatest affection for her.

For a moment, it looks like Mrs Bennet may actually get what she wants.

Then Ryder reveals the offer. He wants Mary to come to Italy with him. They will read poetry all day, drink wine all evening, and live boldly. It sounds romantic. It sounds thrilling. It also comes with one rather important detail.

“Together…but free.”

Meaning: not married.

Oh, Mr Ryder. Charming in theory. A disaster in practice.

Mary is not foolish. She understands the offer, but she also understands why it appeals to her. Ryder makes her laugh. He sees something in her that her family never has. He is offering Italy, poetry, wine and freedom. Very tempting. Very risky.

Of course, her mother hears none of that. Mrs Bennet hears only the absence of a ring. “He didn’t propose,” Mary tells her, and Mrs Bennet immediately starts trying to force the situation back into a shape she understands.

Then Mr Collins and Charlotte arrive, which is a neat little twist. Charlotte’s presence matters because she is the one who first told Mary the rule: marriage or misery. Now Mary is being asked whether there might be a third option.

At dinner, Mrs Bennet is unbearable in the very specific way only Mrs Bennet can be. She markets Mary to Ryder quite directly. The Bennet sisters try to steer her away from that path, but they she can’t contain herself.

“My daughters are a handsome set…

..and only one unmarried.”

The best scene is Mary and Lizzy after dinner. Mary tells Lizzy the truth: Ryder wants her to live with him in Italy but remain unmarried. Lizzy sees the danger immediately.

This is where years of being overlooked finally come out. Mary says they may have grown up in the same house, but their experience of life was wholly different. Lizzy was celebrated and respected. Mary was not.

“I mean, for the rest of you, even in your worst moments growing up, you could look to me and think, ‘At least I’m not Mary.’”

Wow.

Lizzy tries to say she admired Mary’s strength, that Mary never cared what anyone thought. But of course Mary cared. That might be one of the most important things the show has said about her. Mary cared all along.

It’s a heartbreaking and at the same heartwarming scene. Mary’s honesty and Lizzy’s grace in supporting her. She might have been guilty of many of the things Mary claims in her younger years, but its quite clear she has grown up and truly has her sister’s best interest at heart.

In the morning, Mary refuses Ryder. She cannot accept his interesting proposal. She is still bound by society’s expectations, yes, but also by the expectations she has for herself.

A very powerful moment.

Mrs Bennet reacts exactly as badly as you would expect. Mary says, “I will not be marrying anyone,” and her mother hears only failure.

“Why is everything with you so relentlessly disappointing?”

She threatens to keep Mary with her as a companion if Mary cannot take advantage of London society.

One by one the sisters leave Pemberley (except Lizzy of course) and yet again we see Mary alone, agonizing over her situation.

Then, unexpectedly, Mr Collins becomes useful.

He and Mary have a small conversation about loneliness and happiness. He has been reading Aristotle and says happiness depends on “self-knowledge”, on understanding ones own strengths and weaknesses, to be truthful about what one desires from life.

“So, what Aristotle is saying is that our happiness is in our own hands?”

The Gardiners arrive at just the right time and invite Mary to the Lakes, then back to London. Lizzy has helped arrange it. Mrs Bennet tries to forbid it, but Mary chooses to go.

We then get a lovely exchange between Charlotte and Mary, where Mary directly points out that Charlotte appears to be unhappy. To which she replies: “When my mother told me the only choice for a woman was marriage or misery, she neglected to tell me it was possible to be both married and miserable.”

Then Mary departs Pemberley.

“I had made my escape and would not look back.”

This episode gave us a ride of emotions. A climb in character growth. And in the end, it teases more complications for Mary.